[Jandek] Hello Jandek Fans!

Moulty moulty40 at shaw.ca
Fri Feb 18 08:05:38 PST 2005

Hey, knock yourselves out. Listen to the worst comedy albums of all time.

And that's what they are folks, at best.....comedy.

Except that's for maybe 30 seconds, then listening to Jandek is a lot like
standing and staring at a bad car accident.

Hey, if you enjoy Jandek, you'll love my upcomimg 6 album box
set.......comprised of recordings made between 1985 and 2001 of me banging a
tennis shoe against a basketball for several hours.

The only information will be the make of the basketball, Spalding, and the
name of the artist "Mayethel"  I will reveal later that it was May, and I
was talking to Ethel.

This will be my second name, the first name , "JuneKen" had to be discarded
when I was sued by another band called "JuneKen" from Seattle.  Evidently ,
it had been June, and they had been talking to someone named "Ken" as well.

I look forward to the excitement and speculation amongst my many fans when
on my 17th album, suddenly there are TWO tennis shoes banging on a
basketball on a track entitled "Larry joins in".

You'll love the album cover. It's an out of focus photo of a K-Tel Record
Selector and a umbrella stand.

The album will be entitled "Leaving The Rug".

There will be much speculation as to what this "rug" is. And why am I
leaving it? When did I arrive?  Was the basketball sitting ON a rug when it
was being banged?

Some will claim that, obviously, because the sound of the shoe hitting the
basketball changes slightly on album 3.....that it had been on a rug before,
but now it is almost certainly on some kind of linoleum. Some will speculate
that it was Larry who sold me the linoleum, and that the track "larry joins
in" is actually the sound of Larry nailing the linoleum where the rug used
to be. This will cause great controversy.

I may also show up, unnanounced, at a Burger King in Boise, Idaho. A blurry
snapshot will exist. Much discussiom will ensue as to whether I had fries
with that whopper..speculation that will reach a fever pitch when my next
album contains a track called "they were cold by the time I got home"

I am not Mayethel by the way. Mayethel is not here.  I don't want to talk
about it.

Anything else, just ask!

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