[Jandek] Toronto & more ranting...

[Floyd Holden]

Hey all...I drove over 10 hours to see this show and
it was the first time seeing the Corwood rep.  Very
strange and intense show...his stage persona is very
amusing; even if its' not intentional.  I have never
seen an audience so focused on a show before.  I agree
with Seth about the synth sounds...they were hard for
me to get into and seemed very New Age-ish.  I tried
my hardest to get over this and just focus on the
variety of sound being produced.  My girlfriend went
with me (she is intrigued, but not as obsessed as I
am) and she felt the synth got too repetative after
awhile.  The words were something else though...

I found his poetry here to be deep and meaningful.  I
also get the feeling he is discussing a serious
illness and overcoming this.  Still, what if he is
looking at "he" as his old self...and perhaps his old
reclusive self dying away.  He looks back and wonders
"is that really me?", and having "regret".  So does he
now regret not getting more active sooner?  I guess
what's done is done either way.  At the end of the
day, it is probably about a sickness though.  He seems
to dwell on it lately and this probably isn't a
coincidence.  Just hoping if so, he is well recovered
and we have much more to look forward to.  He is
incredibly thin though (wow) and just looks like death
to a degree (as I said, he has a mighty presence). 
The poems were absolutely huge and I agree the show is
probably meant to be one piece.  Very, very intense
stuff.  The lyrics are profoundly personal here and I
felt sad at times.  He talked about destroying
himself.  He probably drank, smoked, and partied a bit
and I wonder if this is what he means?  I am guilty of
the same things (more so a few years back) and I feel
like I am willingly killing myself at times.  These
accesses could easily lead to the "sickbed" as well. 
I was so moved by what he had to say and his moans and
wails just added to the mood.  When you combine the
lyrics with the chaos of the music, it makes more
sense than just looking at the tunes (if you'd call
them that) themselves.  I really want to know what
goes on in the guys head when he creates...there's
just nothing like it in the world.  I look forward to
what lies ahead for sure.

I am sore that I missed the great time in
Chicago...time and money were not ample enough.  It
looks like I missed a blast and I look forward to the
DVD.  I will be going to Indianapolis though and hope
he keeps that rocking spirit flowing.  I hope I can
get some shows closer to home (Virginia) some day
though!  Thanks for reading if you did and take
care...

-Beats   

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